sex

Prostate Pleasure Giveaway

How familiar are you with prostate massage?

For those of you who are men or involved with male partners, stimulation of the male prostate gland internally through the rectum or externally on the perineum can provide much pleasure. (If you need a refresher course in male anatomy, this image should clarify where those parts are located.)

If you're intrigued, check out the definitive guide to P-spot pleasure! Or, read on to find out how you can enter to win a copy!

The “discovery” of the G-spot opened up an era of sexual expansion for millions of women, and now it’s time for the P-spot to claim center stage in the realm of male sexuality. The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure: Erotic Exploration for Men and Their Partners empowers men who may not feel confident exploring anal play to claim the prostate as an erogenous zone ripe for exploration. Men who already enjoy prostate play will find much to learn from sex educators Charlie Glickman, Ph.D., and Aislinn Emirzian, whose wisdom and warmth will be both reassuring and inspirational to readers. This manual supports all men who want to explore this powerful source of sexual fulfillment.

Some things you will find in The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure:

  • ·       Inclusion of all sexual experiences and lifestyles
  • ·       How to maintain prostate health
  • ·       Tips and techniques about communication, massage, toys, positions, etc.

"A great addition to a largely underground history that is finally coming into the light. Everyone deserves the sex information that will make their desires consensually possible, safe, and full of pleasure."

 —from the Foreword by Dr. Carol Queen, Staff Sexologist and Historian at Good Vibrations

About the Authors:

Charlie Glickman Ph.D. is a sexuality educator, writer, blogger, workshop teacher, and university professor. He is certified as a sexuality educator by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists and was a pioneering Program Educator for Good Vibrations for sixteen years. He lives in Oakland, CA.


 

Aislinn Emirzian became a sex educator as a student at Smith College, and later worked with sex positive adult toy stores like Oh My Sensuality Shop in Massachusetts and Good Vibrations in California. Over the years, she has taught workshops on a wide range of topics, but prostate pleasure is her favorite! Check out her website here.

How can you enter to win a copy of The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure?

Include the phrase, "P-spot," in your comment below for a chance to win a hard or electronic copy of the book. A hard copy can only be shipped within the continental United States. Please only comment once per person. This giveaway will run through Monday, June 17, 2013, at 11:59pm. The winner will be chosen randomly via Random.org. Pursuant to FTC Guidelines, no financial or in kind compensation has been received in exchange for running this post and conducting this giveaway.

Good luck!

What’s Dildology?

A friend of mine recently relayed the following story to me:

I went to one of those Girls’ Pleasure Parties recently. When the consultant began describing her briefcase full of sex toys, I asked whether any of the products contained phthalates.

“What are phthalates?” the consultant inquired.

I then proceeded to tell the group about the lack of regulation in the adult toy industry and the fact that many products contain potentially toxic ingredients such as phthalates. I told them to check out your blog or search online for more information.

My friend and I talked a bit about how it's more lucrative for manufacturers to make products with cheaper materials that are linked to cancer, infertility, and liver and kidney problems. There's also little incentive for companies to educate their employees and the public.

Phthalates aren't the only problem, as Dangerous Lilly describes in this post. At sexuality conferences, many educators and bloggers have expressed concern about the following:

  • Companies can put “Phthalate Free” on the boxes of their products whether or not that’s actually the case. (Again, this is an unregulated industry!)
  • Some adult toy manufacturers claim their products are made of medical-grade silicone, when that’s not entirely true. More accurately, we as consumers need to figure out which products are 100% silicone and which are not.
  • Toys can be made with body-safe materials, but the pigmentation can be toxic. A Dutch study found that some yellow toys had cadmium levels so high that the EU would require a radioactive sticker!

This concerns me as a sex educator, a toy user, and a woman who has battled cancer. Without proper labeling and warnings, how do we know what we’re actually putting inside our bodies?

The lawyer in me wonders if we could lobby the FDA, but as Dangerous Lilly describes, that’s problematic because:

We can cry out for the industry to be regulated by our government, but really what will that get us? A higher priced dildo. A “luxury sex toy” that costs double what they do now, and their current costs are already prohibitive to many. Sex toys that take twice as long in development resulting in fewer, quality new sex toys being introduced to the market every year. When you bring the FDA to the party, you get mountains of paperwork, costly fees and annual 3-4 week-long audits to retain your FDA classifications. The better solution just might be to let the industry self-regulate, but with a little help from a neutral party.

So, what can be done?

Enter Dildology.org.

Dildology.org intends to provide material verification services and maintain a public database of the results, adding transparency and oversight to the industry while educating the public about the science behind pleasure products. We stand on our own, unaffiliated and uninfluenced, and we are dedicated to protecting the health and well-being of the dildo-loving population at large through education (and maybe a little entertainment).

The organization is operated as nonprofit, and its mission is based on integrity. An example of this is that they will not accept products directly from manufacturers.

Comprehensively testing the materials within toys costs between $200 and $400. That's a pricey endeavor without any financial backing!

When Dangerous Lilly asked if I would help promote Dildology.org's fundraising efforts, I was all too glad to participate. The industry needs this testing, and we as consumers deserve it!

If you're able to make a donation, any amount is appreciated. There are added incentives if you donate at least $15.

  • Donate $15 or more and you'll receive a coupon code for SheVibe.com or Lovehoney.co.uk.
  • Donate $25 or more and you'll receive the coupon code and a bumper sticker.
  • For $50 or more, you'll get the coupon code, bumper sticker and a t-shirt.
  • And, for $100 or more, you'll receive a complimentary one-hour private toy consultation with Dangerous Lilly herself!

Check out the site, learn more about the products that you’re using, promote this fundraiser on social media, and donate if you can!

Lovehoney.com Ben Wa Balls Giveaway

Are you familiar with Ben Wa balls?

These small, weighted balls can be inserted into the vagina to:

  • Tighten the pelvic muscle;
  • Strengthen the bladder;
  • Help a woman achieve a vaginal (G-spot) orgasm;
  • Heighten orgasm; and/or
  • Increase pleasure during clitoral or anal play.

A reader recently inquired why she didn't notice a difference after inserting the balls inside herself for the entire day. View these kegel exercizers much like you would a trip to the gym to work on a specific muscle group. You don't want to overwork your muscles, and a little bit each day will yield more sustainable results. (It's doubtful that you'll notice a difference immediately either, even with extended use.) There's no need to set a timer when you insert the Ben Wa balls, but if you're trying to strengthen your pelvic muscles, keep the balls inside of you for 10-30 minutes a day.

Lovehoney.com recently introduced a pair of Ben Wa balls as part of its Official Fifty Shades of Grey Collection. This collection is the only one to be approved by the trilogy's author, EL James. 

"This range is what I always imagined while I was writing Fifty Shades of Grey. I'm so excited that the toys I described in the books have come to life and can now be enjoyed around the world." ~EL James

Thanks to Lovehoney.com, one lucky reader will win a pair of Fifty Shades of Grey Delicious Pleasure Silicone Ben Wa Balls!

 

Relive Ana's pleasure and experience excellent pelvic toning with the official Fifty Shades of Grey silicone pleasure balls. Wear them as you go about your everyday tasks or as an accessory to foreplay for a build up to a breathtaking climax.

"I am going to put these inside you, and then I'm going to spank you, not for punishment, but for your pleasure and mine." – Christian Grey

Discover why Ana Steele adores her silver balls with this smooth silicone kegel exerciser and revel in the sensual feeling of 2 weighted balls massaging your G-spot as they jiggle with the most subtle of movements. The action of flexing your muscles around the smooth balls also tones your pelvic floor muscles, leading to greater control during sex and more intense orgasms.

Experience Ana and Christian's pleasure by slipping the smooth ball inside your vagina before a sensual spanking session and stimulate your sweet spots as the weighted balls respond to the action of your play.

Enhance solo play by wearing the Delicious Pleasure balls during clitoral stimulation or wear them during foreplay for a heightened response to stimulation from your partner.

Perfectly sized for kegel ball beginners, the Delicious Pleasure silicone balls have a comfortable girth and light weight for a non-intimidating introduction to vaginal toning exercises. Each ball weighs 32g, giving a combined weight of 64g for an effective workout.

Comment below to enter with the following phrase for a chance to win these Ben Wa balls:

I want to win the Delicious Pleasure Silicone Ben Wa Balls from Lovehoney.com!

This giveaway will run through Friday, May 10, 2013. The winner must reside in the United States. Only one comment per person. The winner will be chosen randomly via Random.org. Pursuant to FTC Guidelines, no compensation or goods have been received in exchange for this post.

Good luck!

50 Shades Class in AmWord Magazine

Earlier in the semester, Alex Korba, a writer for the American University literary magazine, asked if she could interview me regarding my 50 Shades trilogy class. Alex's article is available in the latest issue of AmWord Magazine and reprinted with permission below. (Fellow bloggers might find the last paragraph to be especially relevant!) Hope you enjoy the piece as much as I did!

Fifty Shades Risque? American University's Newest Class

By Alex Korba

Professor and sex educator Stef Woods came up with the idea for the course based on her interest in the double standards regarding female sexuality.

When asked why she picked Fifty Shades as the subject for the course, Woods responded passionately.

“My background is as an attorney, so I started thinking about copyright issues with books on the computer and fan fiction,” she said. “I am also a sex educator; I do a lot of health advocacy and health education. I read it and I immediately thought, this is an abusive relationship.”

It is not uncommon for college courses to use polarizing books as a lens to study cultural facets.  For example, Twilight and The Wire have both been utilized in classes as case studies to examine issues that transcend the books themselves. In the case of Fifty Shades, the very real topics of abuse and mental instability are at play. Just behind the glossy love story these issues beg for attention and they deserve to receive more of it.

Though she believes fervently in the goals of the class, Woods has no delusions as to the literary merit of the book.

“You’re not reading them as you would read a Shakespearean sonnet,” Woods said with a laugh. “You don’t have to analyze every word, or even every chapter.” As an exercise in literary criticism, the class has to edit the first chapter of the book. Woods believes this to be good practice for future careers where employers will need documents proofread promptly.

When asked her opinion on whether the Fifty Shades books give American girls an unrealistically rosy image of BD/SM relationships, Woods replied that she believes this current generation knows better.

“My entire class agrees that there are glaring control issues. The author wrote it as her fantasy and it was targeted at women of that same demographic,” she said. “Their idea of a perfect man on paper is one who takes control of everything when at the end of the day they’re just looking for a man to take out the garbage.”

Because of the controversial subject of the class, opposition is inevitable. Since its publication, the series has been dubbed “mommy-porn” and received scathing reviews by many reporters. This didn’t stop hordes of women from flocking to the bookstores and firing up their Kindles. If anything, the taboo reputation served to increase the book’s popularity.  Like these women, Woods is not fazed by the book’s repute.

 “It’s not a book club,” Woods asserted, “There are 60 other resources. My syllabus is 11 pages single-spaced. I stand by my work product; I stand by this course idea. If you think it’s an easy A, that’s not my class.”

When asked whether she would consider teaching the class again next semester, Woods shrugged and responded, “It’s a short shelf-life class.” She continued on to say that she is very interested in teaching a course with the topic of blogging as a social force. In a world where technology is ever changing, Woods is a professor unafraid to adapt to the changes, even if it means embracing a subject that she could potentially catch flack for.

“Opposition? Ok, that’s fine,” she said dismissively. “For every compliment there’ll be a hundred criticisms, especially in an anonymous online world.”

The Lelo Lily

A friend recently shared with me that she had purchased her first vibrator after reading one of my posts.

“That’s great! Which toy did you choose?” I asked.

“The Lelo Ina 2.”

“What do you think of it?”

“I like it,” she replied and then paused.

I sensed her hesitancy at saying too much more and commented, “The Ina 2 is an amazing toy, but it's so powerful that it might overwhelm a toy newbie.”

My friend just nodded in response. I recommended that her next purchase be a product that’s smaller in size and geared for external (clitoral) pleasure only. Some women can handle a bigger toy or dual stimulation right out of the gate. But, for other first-time toy users, stronger vibrations and a larger product are too much for them.

For those new to adult toys, I advise building up gradually in size, intensity and features. That way, you can take your time to figure out which sensations and options you like best. View exploring toys and finding your favorites as a marathon and not a sprint. There’s no need to break out the big guns until you feel ready to!

The Lelo Siri is an exceptional toy since it’s small in size with vibrations gentle enough for a first-time toy user or woman recouping from an illness or surgery. For those who are comfortable with vibrators, the petite Siri boasts more intense levels of clitoral stimulation.

Another great pick is the Lelo Lily! The Lily wins in many regards:

  • It fits in the palm of your hand, and yet, it packs a powerful punch with five increasing modes of vibrations!
  • Its simplistic and aesthetically pleasing design ensures that the product is discreet and easily portable. The owner of an adult boutique informed me that the Lily is the most popular pick for DC-area attorneys because it can fit in their briefcase and make a long day at work much easier to bear!
  • The toy is rechargeable with seven hours of fun for a two-hour charge.
  • As with all Lelo products, the Lily is made of 100% body-safe materials.

The Lily is a top choice for a variety of pleasure seekers:

  • Females looking for their first toy for clitoral stimulation. This is a wonderful starter toy for external use only. (Don't put the Lily inside your anus or vagina.)
  • Females in the market for a discreet, quiet product with intense vibrations. Lelo describes the Lily as “deceptive powerful,” and I heartily concur! (As a disclaimer for regular toy users who are wedded to their wands, you might need some time away from the wand to harness the full potential of the Lily.)
  • Couples interested in bringing in a small toy into the bedroom for added excitement. This product is strong enough for a woman without intimidating a man.
  • Females recouping from injury, illness, childbirth or medical treatment. Please check with your doctor before engaging in any form of sexual activity (from manual stimulation to use of toys to sex).
  • Females who have had a change in their hormone levels or sex drive from menopause or another health-related condition and have been experiencing difficulty in reaching orgasm.

The Lily is sure to please many a woman and couple! 

Lelo, you’ve impressed me with another toy! The Lily gets my full five squeals of approval!

Lovehoney.com Curvy Toyfriend Giveaway

Raise your hand if you love toy giveaways.

(Okay, you can put your hand down now.)

Lovehoney.com, the sexual happiness people, will provide one reader with a tickler from Toyfriend.

What Match.com and OKCupid are to dating, the tickler Toyfriends are to vibrators! There's a perfect partner out there just waiting for you!

They offer a variety of fun sizes, colors and curious shapes in their line of battery operated special friends.

Eric Kalen, the founder of LELO and Tickler, is more than just the designer behind this cute and fun line of playful vibrators. He's also a matchmaker of sorts, helping us find our vibrator soul-mates, hook-ups or casual romances.

Who doesn't want to fall in love?

With fun, whimsical and functional designs that offer quality and affordability in one convenient and colorful package.

All Toyfriend products are:

  • Made from 100% body-safe silicone;
  • 100% waterproof; and
  • Quiet enough so that no one will know what you’re doing unless you want them to.

For this giveaway, one lucky winner will receive a very special Toyfriend: The Curvy Rocket 5-Function Silicone G-Spot Vibrator! Designed for maximum stimulation, this silicone vibrator is detailed with ridges and bulbs along its full length. Tickler's waterproof vibrator has a gradually-increasing girth for fulfilling G-spot stimulation with every thrust.

An ideal vibrator for experienced sex toy users and beginners alike, this smooth silicone sex toy is tailored for internal stimulation. Offering a smooth insertion that gives way to 6 ever-increasing curves to tease and please your internal pleasure zones.

The design also allows for sensational external play as the ridged contours tease and please your clitoris and labia with a wealth of intensely stimulating textures.

Explore the 5 intense vibration settings, including 3 patterns and 2 speeds with the easy-to-use soft push button base. Scroll through each titillating setting by pushing the button, holding it down for a few seconds to switch the toy off completely.

For maximum enjoyment, use this vibrator with plenty of water-based lubricant. If you remember, silicone lubricant on a silicone toy can make the product tacky to the touch.

Batteries, instructions, a presentation stand and Tickler's one-year warranty also come included.

How can you enter to win a Curvy toy?

Comment below to enter with the following phrase:

I’d love a Curvy Rocket Toyfriend from Lovehoney.com!

This giveaway will run through Saturday, March 23, 2013. The winner must reside in the United States. Only one comment per person. The winner will be chosen randomly via Random.org. Pursuant to FTC Guidelines, no compensation or goods have been received in exchange for this post.

If you’re interested in more chances to win a Toyfriend product, comment on this Lovehoney.com blog post between now and March 31st.

Good luck!

50 Shades Class in WTOP

I joke to my students that The 50 Shades Trilogy class is on its last few seconds of fame. Once people began to realize that the class is academic in nature with a rigorous curriculum, media interest in the story understandably died down. 

WTOP recently posted an article about The 50 Shades Trilogy, after reporter Natalie Plumb attended a class. The full article is available here, but an excerpt follows:

“There’s a lot of misperception that I’m a sexologist who wants to talk about sex with the students, teach BDSM, which in my opinion would be completely inappropriate,” Woods says. “That’s not what my class is about, and I don’t think that’s what a challenging liberal arts education such as is offered here at American is about.”

Woods says when she read “Fifty Shades of Grey,” the first book in the series, her initial thoughts were far from teaching a course on it.

“When I first read the book, I kept saying how ridiculous it was since I personally don’t know of any 22-year-old virgin, who meets a 26-year-old billionaire, who then engages in a controlling relationship with her,” she says.

Have you read any of the trilogy? What were your thoughts on Anastasia and Christian’s relationship?

Laura Meets Jeffrey Book Giveaway

Interested in winning a copy of Laura Meets Jeffrey? Read on to find out more about the book, author and how you can enter this giveaway!

Laura Meets Jeffrey while she’s working in an upscale New York City brothel in 1980 and they share an apocalyptic moment. It’s love at first orgasm. And so begins their double lives in a real life version of Fifty Shades of Grey.

Laura Meets Jeffrey is a love story, a name-dropping, hilarious, shameless erotic cyclone, a documentary of the excesses, dangers and extreme edges of sex, drugs, rock ‘n’ roll, and a close-up personal history of sexual liberation’s primetime. 



At dinner parties she’s known as a witty lingerie model and jewelry artisan, and a famous film director’s ex-lover. He’s her media wizard boyfriend, a designer discovered by John Lennon who worked for John & Yoko, Apple Records and the Rolling Stones, and then created Puritan, the world’s largest-selling explicit sex magazine. On weekends he boxes with Ryan O’Neal and Jose Torres. 



And at night, in the erotic demimondes of New York, Miami and LA, Laura and Jeffrey romp through waves of drugs and lascivious exploration and dive into S&M, porn star threesomes, orgies, glory holes and sex clubs as our unquenchable libidomaniacs fulfill their wildest fantasies.



The late Norman Mailer wrote the Foreword to Laura Meets Jeffrey and considered his famous interview with Jeffrey and Laura on “Ethics and Pornography,” excerpted as a bonus chapter in this book, one of the best of the more than 600 he gave in his lifetime. Besides bequeathing the Foreword, Mailer gave guidance to this account of two lovers, who missed none of the wild era just before the door slammed shut on sexual freedom and aren’t afraid to reveal all of it. 

“There is no such thing as great sex unless you have an apocalyptic moment.” 

• “The difference between writing and literature is agreeable style and irony. This book has both.” 

• “Objective, funny, salacious and perversely-dare I say it- uplifting!” —- Norman Mailer

“Undeniably brilliant.” — Legs McNeil, legendary punk journalist and author of the book's introduction

“Swimming in audacity.” — Dwayne Raymond

"I LOVE Laura Meets Jeffrey!! It makes me laugh out loud; it makes me horny; it leaves me in awe. It's a very funny book. Michelson writes about sex in a way that blows my mind, and his writing, and the point- counterpoint of his voice with Laura’s, brings them to life. What a fascinating character she is! When I finished Laura Meets Jeffrey there was a void. I miss being there." — Elizabeth Mailer
 
Would you like to meet the co-author, Jeffrey Michelson?  Join us on the Goodreads' "Book of the Month" club on The BDSM Group!
 
Want to hear more from the co-author, Laura Bradley?  Read her interview in the UK Daily Mail!
 
Want to enter to win a hard or electronic copy of Laura Meets Jeffrey?
 
Comment to enter below with the title of the book, "Laura Meets Jeffrey," by Friday, March 15th. One entry per person. The winning comment will be chosen at random by Random.org. A hard copy of the book can only be shipped to a winner in the continental United States. Pursuant to FTC Guidelines, no compensation has been received for this post.

Good luck!

50 Shades Class on The District Dish

I always have a great time being interviewed on The District Dish with Kate Michael of K Street Magazine! This month, I was featured on the show for my class on The 50 Shades Trilogy. I thoroughly enjoyed having the opportunity to speak at length abut the class and help debunk some of the misperceptions about sexuality studies and what I'm teaching. You can catch the full interview here:

 

 

I learned at the interview that I was the only guest to be featured on The District Dish three times! Some of you might recall my first interview as an anonymous relationship and sex blogger with my face pixeled out. Sixteen months later, I was back at The District Dish table talking about my breast cancer journey and the Komen Race for the Cure. My, how things have changed!

Hope you enjoy the interview!

Sex: Mind full or Mindful with Dr. Jenn

"We don't talk about the complexity of sexuality. What happens when we don't talk about it is that sexuality ends up in the shadows, and that is where we have shame, embarrassment, exploitation, abuse, and fear."  ~Jennifer Gunsaullus, PhD

Dr. Jenn is a sociologist, sex therapist, and public speaker. I'm also thankful to call her a friend. I thoroughly enjoyed the video of her entertaining and informative talk at a recent TEDxWomen event in San Diego, California. (And, yes, I say that with all bias aside.)

Given that Valentine's Day is tomorrow, we're inundated with media attention and marketing campaigns that emphasize how we need to express our love and passion…on this one day only! Dr. Jenn's TED talk and email tips for Mindful Sex help to remind us to be in touch with our feelings and sexuality everyday!