After writing my previous posts about anal sex, I've received several questions about the topic. Here are some of my thoughts to those questions, as we delve into the back story about anal:*

1. Will it hurt?

Yes, of course. It's not exactly like putting a square peg in a round hole, but there's a reason why some girls comment that their asses are Exit Only. The amount of pain varies, though, depending on how large the relevant body parts are, and your pain threshold.

It will help immensely if you prepare beforehand and have patience during. Try a small toy or finger first. Purchase a high-quality lubricant (Swiss Navy or ForPlay). Take your time and take breaks. Communicate with your partner and make sure he knows that you control the pace and intensity at first. Read some of my other tips about positions that are more friendly for first-timers or those who are experiencing some pain from anal sex.

Rest assured that it does get easier with time and practice. If back door loving is a somewhat regular part of your routine, then eventually, it should only hurt during the first thrust or two, if at all.

2. I'm a straight guy. Isn't anal sex just for gay guys?

No!!! The anus is an erogenous zone, irrespective of your sexual orientation. Yes, homosexual males may engage in anal sex more than the average straight couple. But, why should that concern you any? Your sex life is just that…yours! You should determine what works for you.

Since the ass is naturally tighter than the pussy, anal sex feels different…more intense…and possibly, more pleasurable. An intimate act with your girlfriend or wife doesn't need to be a lifestyle choice or a step on the path toward homosexuality. Think out of the box (pun intended), and with all due respect, check yourself for some homophobia.

If you are comfortable with your sexuality, and you and your woman want to try something new, then why not give it a go? Keep in mind that you can also lay down some ground rules. You may find that you enjoy pleasing your girl anally with a finger, toy, tongue or your cock, but have absolutely no desire for her to touch or lick you in that area. Talk about these things beforehand to figure out both of your comfort levels.

3. I'm worried about…umm…the smell…or anything else coming from back there.

Good question! I think of the book, "The Gas We Pass" and the fact that occasional, minor activity is an occupational hazard with anal sex. Barring a parasite, food poisoning or severe IBS, you should NOT have the same reaction that Tucker Max's girl did during their first foray into anal.

Take your time in the days prior and the minutes before full penetration to acclimate yourself and your ass to the sensation of back door fun. Communicate with your partner (that's a recurring theme if you haven't noticed).

Don't eat a lot of food prior to having anal sex. If you do, some positions might make you feel like you are going to throw up, or toward the end of intercourse, there might be a slight odor in the room. Will it be atrocious? No. But, it will smell like gas or worse (crap).

If that happens, wait until your man cums, laugh about it ("you tapped that ass, baby!"), excuse yourself and come back with a match or candle. It doesn't need to be a big deal if you don't make it one. Likewise, if you feel comfortable enough having anal sex with your man and vice-versa, then you don't need to ignore the obvious.

Try to eat foods that are healthy (low in fat and salt) and more on the bland side to ensure that these things don't arise. If you are on a date with your man beforehand that includes dinner at a fancy restaurant with rich foods, don't deprive yourself, but don't overeat either. (Don't feel bad about any of this either. If you've read my blow jobs posts, I also mention that high salt in a man's diet affects how his cum tastes. Our bodies are wondrous things, but they don't always cooperate as we would like.)

If you have a sensitive stomach normally, be cautious. If you go more than the average person, then don't have anal first thing in the morning. Translation: make sure that you have gone to bathroom and eliminated as much as you possibly can before you have anal sex. That will help make the experience more pleasurable for you both.

There might be a small bit of residue when your man pulls out. If he used a condom, then clean up should be easy. If not, you might want to have a washcloth handy or offer to go get one.

Afterward, you may notice that you are more gassy than normal. (Again, I'm talking about a normal bodily function so don't view this as a big deal.) Logic dictates that the lube and cum that go in have to come out. It won't be anything that your man or anyone else will probably notice, but it's better to know the lay of the land in advance, right?

Happy to answer any more of your questions regarding this or anything else. I wouldn't view any of the above information as a deterrent from anal sex, but rather, that being more informed now may prove useful later.

I walked around Midtown Loft during the DC Twestival, mixing and mingling as City Girl, Relationship and Sex Blogger. I met a few more people, but wanted to get back to my conversation with Buckeyes Boy.

I returned to his table and took a seat on the bar stool across from him. Normally, at an event like this, you give people some space as you're talking to them. My interaction with Buckeyes Boy was different, though. Our feet rested on each other's bar stools…I leaned my body in toward him…his hand brushed against my leg a few times. Being so close to him just felt natural, even though we had only met an hour ago.

We discussed all the topics that you usually would bring up with someone you just met:

Where are you from?
What do you do?
Where do you live in town?

I couldn't stop smiling the entire time that I was next to him. I'm not referring to a relaxed or coy smile here. I'm talking a smile so big that you would think I was competing in a pageant!

Since the Steelers-Titans game was playing on the TV in front of us, our heads turned from time-to-time to catch the game. But, for two football fans, we concentrated much more on each other than the game. And, it was a good game!

The table got pretty crowded as the Twestival organizers finally sat down to enjoy a drink after all of their hard work. One girl accidentally bumped into me, and without hesitating, Buckeyes Boy put his arm around my back to protect me. It was a gesture so simple, yet it made me feel safe.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

I was pretty disoriented, and knew that he could tell that from my expression. Rather than giving him one of my pat responses, I said,

"You like football so I'm sure you've heard of Post-Concussion Syndrome. I have it, and crowds and noise make me really dizzy. But, it'll calm down in a minute or two. Thanks!"

(For those of you who don't know me, I don't normally share this much with someone I just met. But, I didn't feel like it was a big deal.)

"You sure you're okay? Do you need anything?" Buckeyes Boy inquired.

"I'm okay. Thanks. I'll just probably head out soon so I can get away from the noise."

Other people walked up toward us, and he put his arm around me again. When he touched me, I felt that spark that you get when you have an attraction to someone. I hadn't felt that in a very long time. And, I couldn't resist doing something that I had wanted to do the whole evening: I put my arm around his perfect, huge biceps and squeezed. He didn't see that coming, but he took it in stride. We both laughed, as I complimented his guns.

Buckeyes Boy asked for my contact info (of course I gave it to him), and we continued talking some more. When halftime came, I told him,

"I should go now, but I've really enjoyed talking to you. I hope that you'll give me a call!"

He offered to walk me out, and we ended up standing outside Midtown Loft for another 30 minutes. There were a lot of people of the street, but with the exception of the odd man carrying nun chucks into Julia's Empanadas, I didn't register what anyone was doing. All of my attention was focused on Buckeyes Boy.

We talked about his experiences playing football in college and what his plans were now that the Twestival was over. He asked if I was taking a taxi, and I said,

"No, I'll walk back to Foggy Bottom."

"Really?" he inquired with concern. "Are you sure it's safe?"

I liked how protective he was of me, even though we didn't know each other well. It also crossed my mind that the third quarter of the game was almost over by this point. Buckeyes Boy was a Steelers fan, and yet, he was missing the game to talk to me. Huh. *smile*

While we were outside, his friend, Paul, came up to him and asked if he was leaving. Buckeyes Boy replied that he would be going back up to the lounge. Shortly after I left, Paul asked Buckeyes Boy about me and learned that we had met at the event.

Paul to Buckeyes Boy: Really? I wanted to approach you, but it looked like you were in a very intense conversation. You guys were standing like an inch away from each other! You really didn't just meet her tonight? [Buckeyes Boy nodded.] Seriously?

Buckeyes Boy had asked me to text him to let him know that I got home safely, which I did. The last five minutes of the game were quite eventful so as he was stuck on the Metro to Maryland, I started texting him with updates from the game.

When he got home, he called me to say thanks and we talked for another hour. I knew that I had met a guy who was fine, nice and cool. I knew that I wanted to see him again soon. But, I didn't imagine two months ago that attending a Twitter charity event would lead to something so wonderful.

(And, yes, I have tears in my eyes as I'm writing. Really. Happy. Tears.)

As we travel down the road toward Lubrication River yet again, let's talk about two more issues regarding personal lubricants.

In Imerika's comment to my last post, she mentioned that some of her friends thought that K-Y's Warming Gel lubricant burned. The need or desire for lubrication is a personal one, but her words got me thinking…

If it's your first time purchasing lube, you don't have to go for the bells and whistles. Avoid the scented, flavored, tingling lubricants, and just try plain old lube. As I mentioned in the last post, Better Sex Essentials wins with respect to how it feels, how long it lasts and how much it costs. But, K-Y liquid and Astroglide are basic lubricants. Safe or boring might not work in some arenas, but when it comes to lube, don't view basic as a bad thing.

If you are ready to explore scented, flavored or tingling/warming lubrications, go for it! Just remember to apply sparingly at first. You can always add more lube later, but if you put too much on too quickly, it might cause discomfort or a burning sensation. Some women can also develop a reaction or irritation to scented or flavored lubricants so less is more.

Communication and listening to your body also play a role in experimenting with lube. If anything feels uncomfortable, stings or is painful, stop immediately! Get up and rinse the product off of you. Don't feel embarrassed in the slightest. If anything, you can turn it into something fun,

"I don't like this lube. Let's go in the shower so we can rinse off before I [blow you, fuck you, bring you back to the bedroom, etc.]."

With respect to lubes for anal sex, lubrication is critical to the process so explore what's out there as your man explores what's in there. Experiment to see which one is most comfortable for you and which is most pleasurable for you and your partner. I also encourage you to read online reviews or ask for input at your neighborhood sex shop. We all naturally have our own preferences so it can help to get more information at the beginning to make the most informed decision.

Water-Based: If you are looking for a lighter, natural lubricant that also has the advantage of being condom-safe, then stick with water-based. K-Y works, but it might make more sense to invest in a better-quality lubricant that lasts longer and is more cost-effective. Better Sex Essentials fits this bill. You may have to reapply depending on how long you are having sex, but you or your partner can do that with more lube or a few drops of water.

If you'd like something that's a little thicker, but still water-based, go for ForPlay Gel or Sex Grease. ForPlay feels more natural, but Sex Grease last longer. Different strokes…

Any of these brands are odorless and non-staining. There's no need for the whole world (or a family member or cleaning woman) to know that you are using a lubricant.

Petroleum-Based: These lubricants feel less natural, which makes for a more intense experience. That can be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on your perspective and your comfort with anal sex. If you are a newbie to back door lovin', then you might want to avoid petroleum products for a while. Petroleum is oil-based and heightens the sensations more than water-based so be prepared for the kind of sex that you feel from the top of your head to the bottom of your toes. Petroleum lube may bring such intensity that the sex becomes painful. If that's the case, speak up and stop! Or, petroleum lubricants might make the experience more erotic. If that's the case, speak up and continue!

Doc Johnson's Anal Lube is a big seller in the petroleum arena. The pump dispenser is convenient, and you get a lot of bang for your buck. Keep in mind that petroleum lubricants are not condom-safe.

Silicone-Based: Silicone-based lubricants are thicker than water-based, but not as thick as petroleum-based. They last longer than water-based lubricants so there's less of a need to reapply during sex, but they are greasier/slicker. Sensations are a little more vivid than water lubes, but less intense than petroleum. Apparently, they are the best for sensitive skin and cause the least irritation of all types of lubricants. And, they are condom-safe.

Wet Platinum and Swiss Navy are popular brands. According to the saleswoman at The Pleasure Place, there isn't a difference in the ingredients in silicone lube. People tend to make purchases based on packaging, size and cost. Swiss Navy beats out the other brands for its smooth consistency and convenient pump dispenser. It's all about trial and error, though, to find what's most pleasurable and comfortable for you and your partner.

If price is an issue, sex shops typically charge $5-$10 more per bottle of lubricant than online drug or specialty shops. Happy Shopping!

So, I'm not a medical professional, but I am a sex blogger who is comfortable talking to her friends about sex and writing about it for a larger audience. Over the past few months, the topic of lube has come up on several occasions. With the disclaimer that I'm no lube-ologist, here are some musings about using lubrication:

1. The majority of my female friends and readers are in their mid-20s to early 40s. There's a thought that only menopausal women (and not those in our demographic) need lubricant. But, women in our age groups might need a little help getting wet in times of stress, when they are on medication, or after giving birth. I think there's a misperception that a need for lube means that your pussy has dried up or that there's something wrong. Let's try to reframe that, shall we?

If you are too dry south of the border, then sex isn't fun (or easy) for either you or your partner. But, that doesn't mean you need to stress over it. Treat it the way that you would if you and your guy are getting ready to have sex and his cock isn't cooperating.

Getting the attention you deserve often requires communication. Ask your man to touch you or go down on you. Suggest breaking out a small toy. Or, start jerking him off as you touch yourself. If none of those methods are doing the trick, break out a bottle of lube.

Now, you don't need to make a big production out of it. (A guy doesn't tend to show disappointment if he can't get hard right away or if he cums too quickly or takes too long to cum.) No apologizes or excuses. Just get some lube, look your man in the eye and say,

"I just want to make sure things are nice and wet."

Paraphrase as you will, but there's a way to be honest and still be sexy.

If you are a guy, don't look down on a woman bringing lube into the mix. The need for added lubrication is physiological, not a reflection of your skill or lack thereof at turning her on. The goal here is to make you both as ready for sex as possible. If a little extra lube can get her there, that shouldn't be viewed as a bad thing!

2. What lube should you choose? If you are just looking for some added lubrication, go for a water-based lubricant. A water-based lube is condom-safe, silky smooth and closest to a woman's own juices. K-Y is the most popular brand and easiest to purchase because you can get it at any drugstore or grocery store.

But, Better Sex Essentials Liquid Lubricant beats other brands hands-down. It's not as sticky as K-Y or similar drugstore brands, and you get much more bang for your buck since a huge bottle is $12.95. Better Sex also doesn't feel as thick as most lubricants, which can provide a more natural sensation.

3. What about the new K-Y Yours+Mine products?

Last year, K-Y introduced a set of lubricants. One bottle is designed for men, and the other bottle for women. When you combine the two products, there's supposed to be a warming sensation that brings maximum pleasure for both parties. Now, these products can help a woman get wet and a man hard, but they also work if a couple is already excited.

Three couples in my group tried the products with three different results. (That serves as yet another reminder that what might be right for you may not be right for some. And, yes, I just quoted the theme song from "Diff'rent Strokes" in a sex blog post.)

Couple #1: He liked it, but she loved it. A lot. She found sex to be even more pleasurable so she and her partner kept using it. And using it. She used it so much that she developed a bit of a reaction to the product. The bottles are currently collecting dust in her bathroom closet.

Couple #2: He liked it, but she was too sensitive for it. She is able to have multiple orgasms, and the added sensation caused her clit to throb before his cock was even near her pussy. He put his hand on her clit without moving her fingers, and she came. The product heightened the experience so much so that it was distraction from the actual act. Two minutes later, she washed the product off of her. She gave the bottles to her friend.

Couple #3: She liked it, and he loved it. They experienced the warming sensation on the first try and continue to use the products on a regular basis. They enjoy the Yours+Mine set so much that they should be spokespeople for K-Y!