In Full Effect

The weekend prior to my surgery, Mr. Agency and I had planned to get together.  It was tough to coordinate our schedules, though, since his work frequently required him to attend late-night meetings and events.  Mr. Agency suggested meeting at 10:00pm on Saturday night.  I didn’t particularly want to go out that late so I asked if he just wanted to come over for a drink.  (My friend, Autumn, was going to be staying the night, which helped to ensure that drinks wouldn't lead to more than that.)

When Mr. Agency arrived at my apartment, I remembered why I was attracted to him in the first place.  His smile lit up the room, and his energy was contagious!  I poured him a beer, and then we sat in my living room, chatting about every topic imaginable.

Talking to him was easy, and there weren’t any awkward pauses in the conversation.  He was a sports fan like me, an only child and Christian.  He also had family in New York City and enjoyed traveling. The more I learned about him, the more I wanted to know. 

Mr. Agency could tell a story with perfect comedic timing, and he made me laugh out loud — a lot.  When the clock struck midnight, he respectfully said that he should call it a night.  I walked out with him to say goodbye.  While we were in the driveway, Autumn arrived, and we all conversed for a few minutes.  She headed upstairs so I could walk Mr. Agency to his car.

I had figured that Mr. Agency would try to kiss me.  (This had been the third night that I had seen him, after all.)  But, to my surprise, he didn’t!  He just gave me a warm hug and a kiss on the cheek.  Before getting in his car, he said:

You’re awesome.  I hope that we can do this again.

Me [smiling]: So do I.

I walked back to my place, thinking to myself how refreshing it was that a guy didn’t rush to make the first move.  My friends had told me that Mr. Agency was a good guy, and they were right!

Three days later, I had surgery to remove the two cancerous areas in my breast.  I spent hours in the hospital, texting Mr. Exec.  That part of me that wanted to believe Mr. Exec was a decent guy hoped that he would follow through on his promise to be there for me.  But, as anyone who has read the posts about him knows, Mr. Exec was only there for Mr. Exec.

Following surgery, I received three calls from guys:

1) One from Mr. Exec, claiming he was too busy with work to come by that evening.  Work actually ended up being a friend's birthday party;

2) One from Mr. Agency; and

3) One from Best Boy, Mr. Exec’s best friend.

Mr. Agency checked in on me to see how the surgery went and ask if I needed anything.  I thanked him and let him know that I was all set.  I suggested that we get together the following week after I recouped, and he liked that idea.

When Best Boy called, he said:

I’m on 66, heading into the city.  Since I’m close to your place, I wanted to see if you needed anything.  If so, I can pick it up and drop it off.

Me: I’m good, but thanks for offering!  I really appreciate it.

I heard from Mr. Agency and Best Boy in the same day (the day after Mr. Exec called) and thought to myself:

When the chips are down, you know who your friends are.  Mr. Exec had promised to be there for me, but even though we had been sleeping together, he didn't follow through.  Then, two guys who I had never even kissed offered to help me just because they are good guys.  What kind of guy do I want to be with as I'm fighting cancer?

It was at that moment that I knew with 100% certainty that I would never be with Mr. Exec again.  My “No Dickheads During Cancer” rule was in effect.  I wasn't necessarily looking for a serious relationship during treatment, but it was (high) time that I let a caring guy into my life.

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