Communication Is Key

Mr. Agency had indicated that he would come over to my place after his events.  So, when I received a text at 2am in which he wrote that he had gone home and would see me soon, I was irritated.  I texted back:

Seriously?!?  I wish that you had let me know this earlier in the night so I could have made other plans.

Mr. Agency rightfully decided that this was not an appropriate conversation to have over text and picked up the telephone to call me.  We exchanged salutations, and then discussed what had happened.

Mr. Agency: I figured that you were already sleeping since it was so late.

Me: I didn't really fall asleep since we had plans and I didn't want to miss your call.

Mr. Agency: I didn't realize that.  [Pause.]  I didn't expect you to be so upset.

Me: I’m not upset.  I’m disappointed.  You had told me earlier in the day that you were coming over.  It was great to see you at Teatro, and when you left, you still said that you were going to come over later.  If that had changed, you should have let me know earlier in the night.

Mr. Agency: And then you’re all like: I would have made other plans!

Me: I didn’t mean other plans with a guy.  I meant that I might have joined T for a drink at Park.  Or, I would’ve come home and not waited up for you.  [Pause.]  I guess I could have phrased my text better.

Mr. Agency: This is why I don’t normally get into relationships with people.

Me: Because you have to communicate with them?

Mr. Agency: Because my schedule is so crazy that I can’t really date anyone.  I had been thinking about how awesome you were and how we never had a problem, and then this happens.

Me: Umm…we’re both human so if we’re going to keep dating each other, you’ll have to realize that we’re going to disagree or get in tiffs about things.  But, if we communicate with each other, we’ll be fine.  I don’t mind that we can’t go out often, and I’ve told you that I can deal with your schedule.  But, if you say you’re going to do something, I expect you to do so.  That’s not a lot to ask.

Mr. Agency: That’s why I never make plans.

Me: Really?  Even with your friends?

Mr. Agency: Yeah.  They understand that 99% of the time I’m too busy to do anything.

Me: That’s interesting, but it’s a little different with us.  We’re sleeping together.  And, we’re not talking about you going out, but about you coming over after you’re done with work.  I’m cool with your schedule, but you need to work with me here.

Our conversation lasted 45 minutes, but it was rather repetitive in nature.  I kept stressing that he needed to communicate with me, and he continued to highlight how crazy his schedule was and how most people don’t understand his lifestyle.

Me: I understand it, but you need to decide if you’re going to make an effort to come over here when you’re done with work or not.  I don’t care if you come over late, but if you’re not sleeping at my place, we’re not going to see a lot of each other and things definitely won’t work.

Mr. Agency: Okay.  [Pause.]  So, do you want to sleep or should I come over?

Me: I’m definitely awake now, and I’d like you to come over.

Fifteen minutes later, Mr. Agency arrived at my front door.  He smiled when he saw that the sofa bed was made up for him.

Me: See!  I had things all ready for you.  I want to make sure you get your sleep when you’re here.

Mr. Agency: You’re awesome.

Me: So…we’re cool?

Mr. Agency: Yes.

He kissed me, and we walked into the bedroom.  When we woke the following morning, we talked some more about everything.  His schedule was definitely different, but I didn’t view that as a problem, as long as he communicated with me.  I wasn’t sure what the future would hold for us, but I liked him enough to see.

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