More Than Friends With Benefits

After my recent conversation with Mr. Agency, I had some concerns.  Would his lack of work/life balance be problematic for us in the long run?  And, how much of a priority did he place on follow through?  Since I was still getting to know him and liked a lot of the qualities he possessed, I decided to wait and see how (or would that be if?) our relationship progressed.

Given how regularly Mr. Agency made comments about my past dating history and his need to have an emotional connection to reach orgasm, I realized that my friend, T, was right.  If I wanted to pursue a relationship with Mr. Agency, I had to stop sleeping with Best Boy.  I hoped that wouldn’t be too difficult since we were just friends with benefits anyway.

Best Boy was in Los Angeles the week after Labor Day, when I received the following text:

I had a dream about us last night.

Me: Really?!?  What were we doing in the dream?

Best Boy: You were sitting on top on my lap on one of your dining room chairs.  I was doing you from behind with a cock ring on.

Me: Sounds hot!

Best Boy: We need to try that when I get back.

Me: Hmm…maybe.

I sext with the best of them so my apathy spoke volumes.

Best Boy: Maybe?

Me: Well, I started seeing someone recently and feel like I should give that a chance since he's more of a relationship guy.  Hope you can appreciate that.

We texted back and forth a few more times.  Best Boy claimed that he stopped seeing Melanie* because of me, and I responded that was his choice.

Me: I never asked you to do that.  We weren’t dating.  We’re just friends who’ve been having sex.

Best Boy picked up the telephone and called me.  When I saw his name come in on my Caller ID, I noted my surprise to Autumn, who was sitting next to me on the couch.

Best Boy: I’m fine if you don’t want to sleep with me anymore, but I don’t sit on the bench for anyone.

Me: What does that mean?

Best Boy: If you stop sleeping with me now, don’t expect to call me up when you’re no longer in a relationship and start sleeping with me again.  If you take me out of the line-up, that’s it.

Me: Seriously?  So, a year from now, if we’re both single and want to have sex with each other, you’re not going to fuck me because of spite?

Best Boy: Correct.  I don’t play second string.

Me: Umm…okay.  [I look at Autumn with a confused expression on my face.]  Does that mean that we can still be friends?

Best Boy: Of course we can still be friends.

Me: Well, that’s good.  I don’t want that to change.  And, I didn’t want to upset you.  I just wasn’t expecting things to go in this direction with the new guy.

Best Boy and I talked for another 10 minutes, and I sensed how hurt he was. 

When I hung up the phone, I turned to Autumn and said:

Did I just have a break-up conversation with Best Boy?  [She nods her head.]  How could we break up if we were never going out?  I guess he liked me liked me.  [She nods her head again.]

I hadn’t had a friends with benefits relationship in a while because those arrangements never seem to work.  One person always ends up having feelings for the other, and in this scenario, it caught me off guard that Best Boy had developed feelings for me. How could we have amounted to anything more, given his relationship with Mr. Exec?

I felt bad that Best Boy had viewed our relationship differently than I did, but it was time to try something new…with Mr. Agency.

* I gave Best Boy's girl the nickname of "Melanie." In retrospect, that might have been confusing since my web designer's real name is Melanie. They are not one in the same.

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