Feeling safe

Improv Boy and I never talked about whether we were a couple, but we definitely interacted as though we were in a relationship. The dynamic between us felt good and easy so I just tried to roll with it. Whatever was meant to be would be anyway, right?

During one conversation, I told Improv Boy that I had been meditating, when I decided to contact him out of the blue. (He had emailed me regularly back in March, but I wasn’t interested in him so I stopped replying.) I then learned that Improv Boy had thought that I was incredibly rude for not responding to his initial email.

Improv Boy: Girls don’t appreciate how tough it is for us guys. It takes a lot of courage to ask a girl out. And, I did that, and you didn’t even write back. That’s why I wrote the second email, saying that it would be terribly rude of me to have mistakenly sent an email to the wrong person. [He pulls up the email that he had sent me on his iPhone.]

Me: I don’t get it.

Improv Boy: That was my way of saying that YOU were rude.

Me: Oh, really? [I view that behavior as passive-aggressive, but I also respect from where he was coming. I hadn’t been responsive to his emails.]

Improv Boy: When you emailed me after a month about meeting up at Clyde’s, I called Jen [an ex-girlfriend with whom he’s still close friends] to ask if she thought I should go. I didn’t know if I should give you a chance since you had acted so rudely toward me at first. And, I didn’t want to be at a bar with all of your lawyer friends. [I laughed out loud since very few of my close friends are attorneys, which he now knows.] But, Jen convinced me that if I felt enough of a connection to ask you out in the first place, I should meet you for a drink.

Me [kissing him]: Well, I’m glad that you did. [We kiss again.] Really glad.

We smiled and giggled to each other about how everything had transpired. Improv Boy also informed me that he had plans to go out with another girl that week, but that he had canceled the date because of me. That made me smile since I had done the same exact thing with Mr. Attorney.

Improv Boy: I’m traditional, and I prefer to date just one person at a time.

Me: Yeah, me too.

[Now, in the past, that wouldn’t have been the case. But, I was in a much different place now.]

The following day, Improv Boy texted me from the doctor’s office to let me know that he was getting tested for HIV/STDs. He also wrote me the following:

My doctor told me I’m not allowed to date lawyers. He married one. He said I should run!

Normally, the commitment-phobe in me would have been concerned that he talked about me with his doctor and used the word, “marriage,” even in jest. But, I decided not to read too much into any of that and just wrote, “lol,” in response. We were dating. He had a good heart. That’s all that mattered.

The following day, we had planned to go to see a Washington Nationals game with friends. The weather was perfect for a baseball game, as is often the case in DC in May. Improv Boy had bought our tickets in advance and offered to drop mine off since we would be arriving at the game separately.

Me: I don’t mind waiting in front of the stadium for you.

Improv Boy: Why should you have to wait, though? I’m happy to drop your ticket off at your place so you can just go the seats when you arrive.

I smiled, thinking how nice it was to be dating such a caring guy. When he arrived at my place, we began to make out in the foyer…then the living room…and then the kitchen. (That was definitely becoming a pattern for us.) I was packing him up the rest of the Chicken Parmigiana for lunch, when he said:

If the game is too much for you [given that I have Post-Concussion Syndrome], just say the word and we can leave.

Me [smiling again at his kindness]: I should be fine.

Improv Boy: I hope you are, but if you’re not, we can leave at any time and just come home and have sex.

I paused before responding since he knew that I wanted to wait a few more weeks before adding sex into the mix.

Me: Well, it’s not the 29th yet.

Improv Boy [smiling like a giddy school boy]: But I got tested yesterday!

Me: It’s not like you have the results yet, though…

Improv Boy [interrupting me]: But, I will on Monday!

Me: We can talk about it then. See you tonight and thanks for the tickets.

I decided to let the sex issue go for a few days and just focus on this evening. I had a feeling that it was going to be a great night!

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