How can I masturbate when I have a roommate?

Let’s start the week off with a reader’s question via Formspring!

Question: As a college student, it's hard to find time to explore your body when you have a roommate that might come in at any time… what would you suggest?

Answer: Your predicament isn’t one that only college students residing in dormitories experience. Living in close quarters with roommates, in-laws and children can make it incredibly difficult to have the ability to spend some quality time with yourself!

What can you do to get some much-needed space and privacy?

  • Break out your calendar. How does your weekly schedule compare to your roommate’s schedule? When you live with someone, it helps to have a general idea of when they’ll be home or not for safety reasons and planning purposes. Figure out when your roommate will be in class or occupied with other commitments and enjoy that time to yourself.
  • Ask for space. Healthy distance between people living in close quarters is important. Few people will decline an opportunity for some quiet and privacy. Is it possible to set up a system to allow you both to have an hour or two in the room alone?

Broach this matter with your roommate with a relaxed tone. There’s no need to feel ashamed or tell more than you need to.

What not to say: “I’m looking to masturbate. Can I have some privacy on Thursday nights at 9pm?

What to say: "I thought it might be good for each of us to get the place to ourselves for a couple hours each week. How does that sound to you?”

Be creative. Do you own a small, quiet vibrator that can help you maximize your enjoyment in a short amount of time? Could you read erotica on your Kindle to warm yourself up and then retire to the bathroom for a few minutes? Is your roommate a sound sleeper? Do you have access to more privacy elsewhere? Think of options that might work within your own comfort level.

Shower time. For those of you who are living in a home with roommates or family members, have you considering purchasing a detachable shower head? Sit in the bathtub or stand up and hold onto the wall or rail. (If you’ll be standing, make sure that you have a non-skid mat or strips on the floor of the tub.) Switch the shower head to massage or vibrate and then tilt it down toward your clitoris. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. The beauty of the shower head is that you can obtain an intense orgasm in a short amount of time without causing anyone to wonder what you’re up to!

For those of you who have lived with others in close quarters, how did you manage to get some quality time with yourself?

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