In the fall of 2004, I figured that I should start dipping my toes back in the dating pool to see what was out there. At that time, I was looking for someone with whom I could have a "normal" relationship. I wanted a lot of great sex (obviously), but also some love and companionship.

I went back on eHarmony's website, and a guy named Austin caught my eye. He was two years younger than me, 6'1", black, good looking and well-rounded. We e-mailed for a couple of weeks before scheduling a lunch date at the old Cafe Asia on 19th Street. We exchanged phone numbers in case something came up at the last minute. The day before our lunch, my phone rang.

"Hi, this is Austin. How are you?" he said.

"Good, thanks. Is there a problem with lunch tomorrow?"

"Umm…no," he replied hesitantly. "I was just calling to talk."

"Well, I'm in the middle of something right now. Is it okay if we just meet tomorrow as planned?"

"Yeah. Sure. I'm sorry to have bothered you," Austin commented.

"No worries. See you tomorrow!"

I didn't mean to be rude, but I'm a big believer in chemistry. Much like a dude, I know within five minutes of meeting a guy whether I'm interested in him or not. The eHarmony website already did some of the basic compatibility matching for us. The chemistry part would either be there…or it wouldn't. I didn't care to have a whole lot of conversation before that.

When I walked into Cafe Asia, Austin was already seated at a table. He was cuter than his photo (bonus!) and had a great smile. We hugged hello, and he said,

"Wow! I'm glad that you hugged me because I didn't know what to expect after you didn't want to speak with me on the phone yesterday. I was hoping that you would be as nice and cool as you seemed on your profile."

I laughed and told him that I'm better in person. Weekday lunch dates can be awkward, but this one wasn't. Austin was a really good guy who liked sports and music and was very protective of his three little sisters. It was easy to talk to him, and nice that he was a total gentleman, paying for lunch, even when I offered to split the bill.

Normally, guys who are too nice annoy me, but Austin was kind without being a wuss or overly complimentary. He didn't seem interested in fast-tracking things with me (no talk of marriage or children on the first date), and he was genuine. Before the date ended, he asked if he could see me the following week, and I said that would be great.

The following week, I had a minor surgical procedure scheduled. Austin suggested bringing dinner and a movie over the night before the procedure so I would have some company and not sit at home by myself worrying. His caring and initiative won huge points!

He came over, and it was very easy to have him in my condo. He wasn't intimidated by my place, and asked a fair amount of questions about my friends and my parents. Simply put, Austin made me smile…and want to get to know him better.

As we watched the movie, he held my hand and ran his fingers through my hair. When the movie ended, he gave me a big hug and a small kiss, and told me that he hoped that everything went well at the hospital.

I had wanted a kinder and gentler guy in my life. I had found him! All my needs were met, and I slept soundly before the procedure.

Did Austin have staying power?

This is an oldie (a dating adventure from 2002), but a goodie.

I met Michael at Cheesecake Factory on a Saturday morning. That should have be enough of a sign that he wasn't going to be my Prince Charming. But, he was tall and very attractive with light black skin and a Georgetown degree so I gave him my number.

We would meet for drinks now and then. It wasn't serious (no love and no sex), but he was fun to hook up with. Michael always seemed to travel with at least one — and often, several — of his boys. I would get calls from his best friend, Charles, and some nights, both of them stayed over at my place. Back then, I was living in a studio and just had a bed and no couch so sleepovers at my place were quite cozy. But, Charles was always very respectful and Michael was amusing so it wasn't a problem.

On one particular day, I was at work and got a call from Michael. He and his friend, Dylan, wanted to take me out to lunch. I rolled up to the bar at Friday's and found them both already buzzed at 1pm. This Friday's doesn't get much traffic during the day so I felt really bad for all the senior citizens having lunch there. Michael was all over me like it was 3am and we were leaving a club.

He then started talking to Dylan about how much he liked kissing me and wouldn't Dylan like to kiss me. Dylan seemed open to it, and I replied, "Sorry. I'm not MCI. I don't do Friends-and-Family." (An MCI reference is dated, I know, but those ads were all over TV back then.)

I had to head back to the office, but Michael and Dylan mentioned that they might come over later and we could go out to dinner. I just told them to give me a call. Several hours later, as I got home from the gym, my phone rang. It was Dylan, saying that he and Michael were coming by with Chinese food in an hour. I told him that I was pretty beat, but if it was just for a few hours, that was cool.

Shortly after the call, Dylan showed up at my door with a bottle of wine.

"Where's Michael?" I asked.

"He went to get the Chinese food. He should be over in a little."

An hour later, I was starving and Michael still wasn't here. Dylan left a message for Michael, but he didn't call back. By this point, the wine bottle was almost empty and I hadn't had a glass. As Dylan got more and more buzzed, he kept moving closer and closer to me. Then, he offered to give me a foot massage. Umm…no thanks.

Finally, I just said, "Is Michael really coming over?"

"Well, I think so. But, you know him. He's probably out with another girl."

"We're not in an exclusive relationship," I replied. "He's free to date whomever he chooses, as am I. I just don't feel comfortable having you over if he's not coming."

"Oh. Okay. Can I just use your bathroom?"

"Sure," I said.

I kept watching the movie and was trying not to fall asleep. But then, I noticed something out of the corner of my eye. Dylan came out of the bathroom, wearing nothing but a lavender thong. What kind of guy wears a LAVENDER THONG? (Most guys I know wouldn't be caught dead in a thong — ever.)

I tried to look away because it was like watching a train wreck. He then started prancing around in the thong, jiggling his package. "You want some of this?" he asked.

"NOOOOO! Put some clothes on and get out of my place."

"Don't you like me? I know that I could satisfy you. Michael said that you were really fun."

"Get the hell out of my place! NOW!"

He put on his clothes and left. The image of him in the thong still haunts (or amuses?) me to this day. It was so wrong that it was funny. No guy should be wearing a thong unless he's a professional bodybuilder. And, Dylan was definitely not that.

A few days later, Michael called and I told him what happened. He had absolutely no idea that Dylan had even come over to my place, let alone under false pretenses. When I told him the purple thong portion of the program, he was livid. Michael and Dylan worked for Michael's father's company. Dylan lost his job because of this since Michael and his dad thought this was so irresponsible.

Even though I only spent a few hours with Dylan, I will never forget him. Thank you for the laughs, Purple Thong Boy!

Happy New Year's everyone!