A horrible first date

It was fall of 2007, when a friend IM-ed me about fixing me up with this guy he had just met. I’m not one for blind dates, but I was told that he was funny, attractive, educated and second-in-command at the embassy.

“Which embassy?” you might be asking.

Well, I probably shouldn’t say, but I viewed the embassy connection as a huge plus since I had lived in his country for a year. I was looking forward to the guy’s call and saw some potential. Boy, was I wrong! Read on to find out why our first date was also our last:

1. He picked Starbucks as the meeting place (Picking Starbucks is not a deal breaker on its own, especially for a casual and quick get together, but it’s definitely not the most creative place for a first date);
2. He asked when I was available. I said, “11.” And for the next 15 minutes on the phone, he kept insisting that we were meeting at 10. The following morning, he tried to get me to agree to 10:30. 11. I told him that it was fine if he wanted to grab breakfast on his own, but he insisted that he could wait until 11;
3. I rolled up to the Starbucks and noticed that he was already having coffee and a muffin with his roommate. Huh? He did not apologize nor did he introduce us;
4. He did not offer to pay (I’m cool with paying my way, but an offer is nice);
5. He maligned my choice in beverage from Starbucks as unhealthy. Since he’s neither my Mom nor my husband, I was not cool with that;
6. He then asked if I would drive him to the bank so he could cash a check. Who does their banking on a first date? I decided not to tell him what I really thought of him at this point and ride it out because we have a friend-in-common;
7. He got annoyed when I did not know where the nearest branch of his bank was located;
8. Next, he asked me to take him shopping since he needed things for his new place;
9. He became cross when I turned left, instead of right, to get to the store, despite the fact that I learned to drive in this city and know where I’m going, whereas he just moved here and doesn’t have a car;
10. He then asked me to take him to another place to drop off the items he purchased at the store;
11. He was wearing a fanny pack. (Initially he carried it over his shoulder, but then he put it around his waist — and kept it there);
12. He did not stop talking about himself and his pedigree. “I fence. I ride horses. I drink only the finest Italian wines. I have a flat in London;” and
Unlucky 13. After our “date,” he was deluded enough to call a mutual friend to say how much he likes me and express his confusion as to what went wrong?!? Are you kidding me? He doesn’t need a girl. He needs a driver and a personal assistant!

Mr. Starbucks, as I refer to him now, called me twice after this “date.” I, of course, let his calls go to voicemail. In his messages, he asked me to call him and mentioned us getting together again. I pressed delete. Can you blame me?

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